After a frantic search for star talent willing to perform at Donald Trump’s January inauguration, Kellyanne Conway announced that she had found a solution.
“Bill and Hillary have agreed to play a special medley of songs for the event. They are also bringing some special guests.”
When contacted on a mountain top in upstate New York, Hillary said, “Yes, it is true. My therapist suggested that I keep busy and boy am I sick of hiking.”
Bill Clinton was livid and only agreed to participate if he could have a solo in Johny Paycheck’s song, “Take This Job And Shove it.”
Hillary said that she was very excited to perform a song she has been practicing daily for eight years.
When asked which song, Hillary replied, “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” by The Rolling Stones.
The Clintons were given permission to add some diversity to the program.
Said Bill, “We are happy that the Trump team allowed us to bring in a Mexican mariachi band to perform “The Wall” by Pink Floyd.”
“Trump followers should love it, particularly the famous line, “We don’t need no education.”
“As it clearly describes the core belief of Donald’s base.”
Steve Bannon was incensed. “Sure, Conway lets the murderers and rapists perform but she nixes my favorite group growing up.”
When Chuck Schumer heard about this, he smiled and said, “Pick Up The Pieces”….It looks like we just found the Democratic Party’s slogan for the 2018 mid-term elections.”
Contacted at Mar-a-Lago, Mr. Trump said that his only demand was that Barron’s school chorus participate.
Said Trump, “I think it is tremendous that they chose “London Bridge Is Falling Down.”
“Because, as I have been saying for over a year now, “Then off to prison she must go, My fair Lady”