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July 4th Poll Finds Majority of Educated Americans Feel Revolution Was A Mistake

A new poll, released by the Ziff Group, finds that eighty percent of educated Americans want our nation to go back under British Rule.

Ziff’s President said, “There has been a big swing on the issue since Biden’s debate performance and The Supreme Court’s Presidential immunity decision.”

At British Consulates all across America, Democratic protestors are demanding that King Charles agree to take America back. Connie Barrett, a protestor in front of the New York consulate, told us, “If we become part of Mother England again, we promise to drink tea, eat spotted dick and not have any dental work done.”

Outside the British Embassy in Washington DC, many protestors were wearing MABA hats. One such protestor explained, “It’s time to Make America British Again.”

A Democratic strategist commented on the poll numbers, “A majority of people who can point to England on a map prefer a competent Monarch to one run by The Orange Prince.” He continued, “The majority of Democrats also believe that Biden should declare Trump and six Supreme Court Justices enemies of the state and deport them, which is now perfectly legal under the six geniuses’ new immunity rules.”

A leading American historian had this to say about the situation. “Our nation’s main beef with the Brits back then was having no representation. A similar thing is happening here today.” She continued, “I mean why should piss-ant states such as Idaho, North Dakota and Alabama have the same number of Senators as New York.”

We caught up with Donald Trump at a golf tournament in Bedminster New Jersey and asked him for his take. “I have two things to say; First, Sleepy Charles is the worst Monarch in history, I don’t understand why anyone voted for him and second, if Henry The Eighth had six wives, can Donald The First have seven porn stars?”

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